Meet Linda Brendle, Author of “A Long and Winding Road: A Caregiver’s Tale of Life, Love, and Chaos”

The Accidental Author

by Linda Brendle

My goal in life was not to become a writer. I enjoyed writing when I was younger, and I toyed with the idea of making a career of it until I received my first negative review from an English teacher. I don’t take criticism very well, and I took her comments personally. Years later, though, after the sting of her rejection had faded, and especially when I became a caregiver, the need to express myself resurfaced.

Becoming a caregiver was not one of my ambitions either. When I was in the seventh grade and was asked to write an essay on “What I Want to Be When I Grow Up,” my choice of careers was not caring for my aging parents. However, when a loved one has a need, you step in to help. Then, whether by small increments as the need progresses, or all at once because of a catastrophic event, you realize that you have become a caregiver.

When I became a real hands-on caregiver, I often went to Aunt Fay for advice. She’s Mom’s younger sister, and she cared for both her mother and her husband for many years. One thing she told me was to keep a journal, because one day my experiences might be of help to someone else, and I took her advice. I didn’t write every day, but after a particularly trying episode, I’d write about it and post it on Facebook. It was a safe way to vent, people responded positively, and I was encouraged to continue to write.

Later, my husband David and I bought a motor home and fell in love with the RV life. We were both retired, so we decided to take an extended trip through the southeastern part of the United States. Mom and Dad were living with us by then, so they were included in the plans. I knew that sharing a tiny living space with two people with Alzheimer’s, even two people I loved dearly, would lead to many trying episodes, so I took along several of my favorite pens and a spiral notebook.

Initially, I had no larger purpose in mind than to keep a record of our travels and perhaps gather material for a few Facebook posts. But situations that can be overlooked in a 2,600 square foot home are in your face in a 40-foot RV, and I began to pay closer attention to what was going on. I discovered more than I wanted to know about how much Alzheimer’s had taken from Mom and Dad. I realized that the simple tasks of taking a shower or shaving had become overwhelming, and simple decisions like ordering from a menu were impossible. I also recognized my own denial of our new reality.

By the time our journey was nearing its end, I began to wonder if my journal might be more than just a practice exercise, and visions of a book danced in my head. Once we were home and settled, I transcribed the handwritten manuscript onto my computer and polished it a bit. I asked my son, who had already published several books, to take a look at it. His response went something like this:

“You tell a good story, but where is your story? Why are you in Florida; why are you caring for your parents; and who is David?”

I went back to the keyboard, and for the next several years I edited again and again. I worked hard to break through the protective barriers I had built around my own feelings and to share the harsh realities of this horrible disease and the good, the bad, and the ugly of how I dealt with being a caregiver. When I finally went public, my readers said my story made them feel less alone. By exposing my own fears and failures, I had given them permission to accept their own shortcomings, and to tell their own stories.

I began to write because it was personally therapeutic, but I continue to write because my stories touch others. People who have little joy left in their lives laugh with me at the antics of my sweet family; those who have shed an ocean of tears are encouraged when they discover that someone else understands; and some who feel like caregiving is a dead-end are inspired to keep living in spite of their situations. My book isn’t a best-seller, but as it helps ease the burden of those who are dealing with Alzheimer’s, it somehow gives a sense of meaning to Mom and Dad’s struggle – and that is all the success I could hope for.



About the Author



I cared for my mother and father, both of whom had dementia, for fifteen years. After that season of my life passed, my husband David and I moved to the country where I work part-time at my church, garden when the notion strikes, tend to the whims of the feral cat who took over our home two years ago, and write about all of the above.

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Meet Meg Foster, author of “7 Spiritual Steps for Caregivers: A Path to Meaning and Hope in Alzheimer’s & Dementia Caregiving”

7 Spiritual Steps – A Journal to Ease the Way

By Meg Foster

According to Alzheimer’s International, globally, there are nearly 44 million people that have Alzheimer’s or a related dementia.

In America alone, there are 5.3 million living with Alzheimer’s disease. 74% of caregivers of people with Alzheimer’s disease and other dementias reported that they were “somewhat concerned” to “very concerned” about maintaining their own health since becoming a caregiver.

Certainly these caregivers and their loved ones are in a health care crisis

The immediate needs of these families in crisis are practical care coordination support and resources. But as those needs are sought by families, which is no easy task unto itself, there are also emotional and spiritual needs of the caregiver that cannot be overlooked, but are in most instances.

I summarize that need as Spiritual Health – the emotional, physical, spiritual and social well-being that is critical for caregivers to sustain this caregiver journey.

I was the caregiver to my husband Dean, who was diagnosed with Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD). It was a tough, long path of seven years for Dean. But for me, as his caregiver, I was on a different but related path – the caregiver path.

Often Alzheimer’s and dementia caregivers feel lost, alone, and overwhelmed. I wrote 7 Spiritual Steps for Caregivers: A Path to Meaning and Hope in Alzheimer’s & Dementia Caregiving to alleviate those feelings with a self-awareness process and tools. This is a straight forward structured guidebook for family caregivers to discover and build upon their spiritual health foundation which will strengthen them for this arduous journey.

Through growth in self-awareness and the strengthening of a spiritual foundation, caregivers can then experience ease, meaning and hope in the reality of their daily caregiving duties with their loved one thus reducing stress, anxiety, and feelings of being lost, alone and overwhelmed.

The feedback on the book has been positive and I’m excited to share this information. A recent Amazon book reviewer said, “Good resource and worksheets for caregivers. It gets you through the process with more grace and forgiveness, so that you can be the calm in the storm.” I hope many others can have easy access to spiritual help and that gives me satisfaction that my experience can be useful for others. There’s an ebook, paperback and expanded journal paperback available on Amazon.

Wishing you Light on your Caregiver Path,

Meg Foster

Purchase 7 Spiritual Steps for Caregivers Journal: A Path to Meaning and Hope in Alzheimer’s & Dementia Caregiving 

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Welcome back, Joy Johnston, author of “The Reluctant Caregiver”

By Joy Johnston

Not everyone is born a natural caregiver.

Unlike some caregivers who can draw upon their experience as a parent or time spent taking care of siblings when they were younger, I had no such reservoir of caregiving knowledge when my parents fell ill. An only child who lived 1,300 miles away from my parents, my father began showing signs of dementia while I was in my mid-thirties. Assuming the role of long-distance caregiver, I helped my mother by paying bills, sending supplies, and researching care options.

It was not until six months after my father’s death, when my mother suddenly fell ill and was diagnosed with colon cancer, that I became a primary caregiver. I was woefully unprepared and frankly, reluctant to step into the role. My mother required emergency surgery and faced a lengthy recovery. I ended up quitting my job and temporarily moving to New Mexico to care for her. What followed was a crash course in caregiving, with all the ups and downs that comes with the territory, like the most terrifying roller coaster in the world. (I’ve always hated roller coasters.)

For the next several months, I served as my mother’s caregiver and patient advocate. My mother suffered complications and required rehab in a skilled nursing facility. I filled out copious amounts of paperwork, ensured my mother was getting proper care, and made modifications to her home for her eventual return. Caregiving is physically, mentally, and emotionally the most challenging job I’ve ever had, and it gave me a whole new appreciation for caregivers.

I began writing essays about caregiving when my father was in the memory care center during the last year of his life, and continued writing through my mother’s battle with cancer. The essay writing was both therapeutic and empowering. I submitted some of these essays to online outlets and found they generated a passionate response. Fellow caregivers seemed to appreciate my nontraditional perspective and opened up about their own difficult caregiving experiences. This encouraged me to release The Reluctant Caregiver, a collection of these personal essays. My brutally honest writing style contains language that some may find objectionable, but the essays also depict the love, humor, and heartbreak that accompanies the caregiving journey.

There are many wonderful books for dementia caregivers and about family caregiving in general, but I felt that there are few books that speak to the Generation X and younger crowd in a realistic manner. For those familiar with the book, Sh*tty Mom: The Parenting Guide for the Rest of Us, I wanted to capture a similar tone, but for caregivers. I also wanted to be inclusive of those who may have reservations about caring for a family member and that it’s okay to have feelings of reluctance, fear, and resentment. If I survived and even became pretty darn good at caregiving, then you can too!

Note: The Reluctant Caregiver contains profanity and graphic descriptions of medical care. 

The Reluctant Caregiver on Amazon

About the Author:

Joy Johnston is an experienced digital journalist who is a National Content Editor for Cox Media Group, where she specializes in creating viral content that drives web traffic and social engagement.

Joy received the 2015 Rick Bragg Prize for Nonfiction from the Atlanta Writers Club. Her work has been published in Chicken Soup for the Soul and other anthologies. Joy also works to raise awareness of Alzheimer’s and caregiving through her blog, The Memories Project, and through essays that have appeared in digital and print formats. The Reluctant Caregiver is her first book.

Social Media:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheReluctantCaregiver/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/reluctantcare

Website: http://www.joyjohnston.com/

Meet Linda Jenkins, Author of “To Helen With Love: A Memoir of a Daughter’s Caregiving Journey”

By Linda Jenkins

After five years in the making, writing this memoir has been one of the most intense endeavors I’ve ever taken on, but well worth it.

While I was writing this memoir I discovered how much pain I still had deep inside of me. Pain from some of the experiences. Pain from not knowing what or how to deal with dementia. Pain of not understanding what caregiving entails. Pain from dealing with the healthcare field. Finally, pain when it’s all over.

Many times through my caregiving years I felt lonely inside. Even after my Mother’s death I felt loneliness. You know what I mean if you are a Caregiver or have been one. Even though I was surrounded by family and people I loved, there was still a sense of loneliness.

Pouring through my journals to capture information for my memoir was like going back in time and reliving the experiences. Some of my entries were humorous and other entries were screaming, “Help! I don’t understand.” Still others were filled with sadness and torment. I even found myself in tears while typing the manuscript! I began to realize I wasn’t “done” with my grieving, not even close. That’s when I discovered I had not had any closure; I had no idea how much I needed that. Personally, I don’t believe we ever truly “get over” the death of someone we love, we just learn to accept it; we never really forget. My loved ones are still close to my heart.

My intention for writing this memoir is to help other caregivers know they are not alone in their journey; to let them know it’s an ongoing learning experience all the way to the end. There’s no magic wand to free up the pain and sacrificing a caregiver deals with.

In my personal experience, my faith was my saving grace throughout my caregiving years. The Lord carried me through some rough and turbulent seas, without Him I would have drowned.

A scripture that came to me during the writing of my memoir, and is included inside the book is: “Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” Psalm 30:5.

The feedback I’ve gotten from my book has been one of encouragement, hope and most of all keeping the faith. This is confirmation of the need caregivers are searching for.

Purchase To Helen with Love, A Memoir of a Daughter’s Caregiving Journey

About the Author

Linda Jenkins has been in the skin care field for 18 years. Time spent with individual clients taught her how deep a relationship can go with genuine caring and the importance of touch. Having a nurturing character and personality helped her as she became the primary Caregiver for her mother after a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s. Living the role as a caregiver, journaling along the way, Linda was compelled to share her experience with others after the death of her mother in 2011. To Helen With Love, A Daughter’s Caregiving Journey offers information, support and inspiration.

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Meet Rick Lauber, author of “The Successful Caregiver’s Guide” and “The Caregiver’s Guide for Canadians”

What motivates a writer to write a book? It could be to share a story, educate/help the reader, or to entertain. I wrote both my books to support readers, raise awareness for a growing issue, increase understanding, and also to personally cope.

Before becoming a twice-published book author, I was a former co-caregiver (working with my two sisters) for my own aging parents (Mom had Parkinson’s disease and Leukemia while Dad had Alzheimer’s disease). This was not a job I was expecting or prepared for and it came with a steep learning curve. Not only did I face a quick education about eldercare, I also had to deal with the physical, mental, emotional, and financial impacts of caregiving–-it is certainly challenging to helplessly watch your parents decline.

Standing by as Dad’s Alzheimer’s disease progressed was heart wrenching. He not only forgot his own life and career but also me as his only son (I often say that I lost Dad twice–once when he didn’t recognize me anymore and once again when he passed away). As a means of managing my mounting stress, I turned to writing. Writing provided me a safe means to privately–or publicly–share my thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Some of my stories have remained forever saved on my computer’s desktop while others were published in newspapers, magazines, and blogs; these same stories became the platform for my two books–the first titled “Caregiver’s Guide for Canadians”and the second titled “The Successful Caregiver’s Guide.”

Following the publication of both my books, I have turned from author to promoter. While speaking about oneself and/or one’s own work can prove to be difficult for introverted writers, it is necessary as a writer is his/her own best salesperson. One of my favourite means of promotion is through bookstore signings where I will visit a bookstore for several hours and meet with store customers. My initial book signings proved to be quite nerve-wracking (as I felt like a fish in a fishbowl for all to see); however, I have become more comfortable and confident with personally meeting others who are preparing for caring, currently working as a caregiver, or recovering from a previous caregiving journey and have found these times to be valuable…I not only hear many touching stories from those I meet but also high praise for what I have written.

Feedback on both my books has included “Superbly written”, “A lifesaver for anyone who is caring for elderly parents,” and “A wonderful, concise, practical book.” While writers may “sit”on a story and revisit it repeatedly to tweak the wording (meaning a story may never become published…), hearing from many readers about how helpful my books have been to them and their families, I am at peace with what I have written and have no regrets. I like to think that my father, a retired English Professor, would have been very proud of his only son’s writing accomplishments. I had never imagined writing a book–let alone two books!–but I am very pleased that I found the strength and courage to do this, as well as a publisher who has continually supported me and believed in the idea.

Purchase “The Successful Caregiver’s Guide” and “Caregiver’s Guide for Canadians”

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Mary Ann Drummond Shares Grandma and Me – A Kid’s Guide for Alzheimer’s and Dementia

By Mary Ann Drummond

Nearly five years ago, after presenting at an Alzheimer’s caregiver conference, a seed was planted in my heart to write a children’s book about Alzheimer’s and dementia. When the conference was over one of the attendees came up to purchase one of my books. As she was leaving she asked if I could recommend a book to help her young child with the changes her family was experiencing since her mother was diagnosed with dementia. I was at a loss. I had been so focused on education for adults that I had not researched current literature for children.

I soon learned there were several great titles available to help children understand the dementia journey. What motivated me to add to the existing collection was the growing need to help young children not only understand this difficult topic in a sensitive, age-appropriate way, but also a sincere desire to give families tools to help maintain connections for as long as possible.

Last year, I was blessed to partner in this project with a talented co-author, Dr. Beatrice Tauber Prior, and a brilliant illustrator, Julia Walther. The imagery in the beautiful artwork of Grandma and Me helps to capture the child’s imagination. My grandson liked the book so much he took it everywhere with him for two days, even into the movie theater!

Together with Beatrice and Julia, my vision for this book came to life in a much greater way than I could have done alone. Children aged five to nine are drawn into the story, learning how to help their loved ones while maintaining a loving relationship. There is a special counseling section for parents at the end to guide them as they continue to work with their child. Grandma and Me helps to address a young child’s feelings, provides tools to help them feel successful in their interactions, and provides answers on how to maintain the connections between family members, despite the disease.

The first review I received was from a young reader who bought the book to help explain dementia to her little brother. Both Beatrice and myself were deeply touched by her words: This book is about a sad topic, but it explained very well about the Alzheimer’s disease. The pictures are very entertaining and captivating. We were drawn right into the book with the exciting story. Now I know more about this, and I can help explain it to my younger brother.

I am thankful for the partnerships that brought this book to life. From the caregiver who planted the seed in my heart several years ago, to my co-author Beatrice, our illustrator Julia, our publisher Morgan James, and most of all, the many special people who have dementia that we have had the pleasure to care for, learn from, work with and know. You are all part of the tapestry that has made Grandma and Me – A Kid’s Guide for Alzheimer’s and Dementia one of the newest resources available for the dementia care family.

Website: www.angeltreepublishing.com

Twitter: @RN4ALZ

Amazon: Grandma and Me – A Kid’s Guide for Alzheimer’s and Dementia

Meet Kathi Macias, author of "To The Moon and Back"

By Kathi Macias

As a fulltime writer/editor, I was blessed to be able to work at home and take care of my mother during her last few years of life. I was also blessed that even up until her death at the age of ninety, she was clear-minded. Sadly, so many others are not, making their caregiver’s job so much more difficult.

Though I didn’t have to deal with the issue of Alzheimer’s with either of my parents, I have countless friends and acquaintances who have done so in the past and are doing so even now. Because I write novels about current issues, it seemed a natural choice to base one of my books on the heart-rending topic of Alzheimer’s.

As I planned the book, I realized I wanted it to be about more than what the caregiver experienced; I wanted it to be told (primarily) from the viewpoint of the person actually experiencing Alzheimer’s. And so the idea for To the Moon and Back was born.

Rachel, my primary character, is in her late sixties and also in the early to mid-stages of Alzheimer’s. At times she is clear-headed, but more and more often she finds herself slipping into what she considers “the darkness,” where she begins to lose herself and the memories of a life she once considered happy and fulfilling.

With the increasing darkness comes more and more confusion and fear—and yes, even anger. Her husband of nearly forty-five years, dealing with health issues of his own, is perplexed at the changes he sees in Rachel. Their grown daughter, who comes home to help out, is the first to suspect the problem, but she tries desperately to come up with alternate explanations for her mother’s erratic behavior.

As this family takes its first tentative steps toward acceptance and working through this devastating diagnosis and debilitating disease, readers are drawn in and better able to view and understand the issues related to Alzheimer’s because they can “feel” those issues through the eyes and hearts of the book’s characters. That’s why I felt it was important for me to write about this issue in a fictional setting; the feedback I’m getting from readers confirms I was right. Many, in fact, have told me they’ve found numerous helpful nonfiction books about Alzheimer’s, but To the Moon and Back is one of the few fictional resources available.

In addition to the moving story of a family dealing with Alzheimer’s, I’ve added a “Making It Personal” section at the end of the book, containing thought-provoking questions that can easily be used by individuals or in a group setting. These questions are followed by a section of resources for caregivers and friends/family members of those with Alzheimer’s. This particular disease, perhaps more than most, is definitely a “family affair,” and I believe it is important to approach and deal with the topic with that fact in mind.

I can be reached via my website (www.kathimacias.com).
On Facebook (Kathi Macias—personal page; https://www.facebook.com/Kathi-Macias-75996188045/ --author page).
On Twitter (@alandkathi).